Such a stupid phrase – “I’ve fallen off the wagon” – what does that even mean? Seriously? What wagon? Wagon wheels? Mmmmmmmmmm wagon wheels. NO CAT. No more biscuits. Really though, how can someone fall off an imaginary wagon. I say we outlaw that phrase. Not actually sure if outlaw is the correct term of phrase but whatever.

I had an interesting conversation with a new friend today. I have lots of interesting conversations but this one in particular made me think about life. How very deep and meaningful. Obviously I am talking about FOOD life. Not “who am I?” life. Man I love Zoolander quotes.

So the conversation I had went something like this “My problem is I can only lose weight if I eat the same thing everyday and that gets pretty boring”. Hands up if you recognise this statement. I DO. I get into awful habits of prepping huge amounts of food for a week and thinking I’m doing really well with it all and then it’s Wednesday and it’s chicken and avocado and salad for lunch again and I am ready to staple my stationery to my face to stop myself going out and buying the nearest baguette (I LOVE baguettes).

The trouble is unless you are very good at self control or you have been living a certain healthy lifestyle for a long time it can be extremely difficult to find the right balance. How do people only have ONE biscuit? How does someone not feel like they have “fallen off the wagon” if they spend the weekend in McDonalds? Well that’s just it. Remove the wagon. Insert LIFE and realise that we cannot be constantly “good”. Do you see what I’m saying.

It’s going to be “the mooooost wonderful tiiiiime oooffff the yeeeeeear” soon and I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend those two weeks (yeah I give it a two week period of time) feeling guilty or bad. HEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLL NO.

I have spent the past two months going back and forth with my food and my training. Busy schedules, cravings, illness, tiredness, social life. None of these things add up to six pack abs and lean legs. But it’s totally fine. On Monday night this week I was getting myself into a stress about feeling fat and eating “naughty” food (my weekend literally consisted of Mcdonalds, melted cheese, roast dinners and popcorn – it was INCREDIBLE). So I opened my fridge and pulled out ALL the veg and defrosted some chicken and prawns and set about boxing up my lunches for the week. I’m already walking 6 miles a day for my commute and I am slowly getting back to the gym twice a week.

Sometimes it takes time. Sometimes you will smash the green veg and water and other times you will inhale fries. Don’t nail yourself to a cross. Give it some time. It has taken me TWO MONTHS to get back into a mindset where I am organised and happy to eat veg instead of Percy Pigs and Kettle Chips. Sometimes you have to take a break. And before you say it, yes I know not everyone has done an Ironman but people have different challenges. Be nice to yourself.

I guess what I am trying to say is burn the wagon. Throw it off a cliff. Try and find a healthy balance. iPhone’s now have that “health” app which tracks how many steps you take every day. Roughly speaking 10,000 steps is around 300 calories. That’s a decent dent in a daily feed! (I’m averaging around 9,500) Start small and work up. Repeat. I am LITERALLY doing this. I have started walking. Nailed that so now I am starting to lift weights again. Once I’ve nailed that I’ll start doing interval training again. Chris (Boyfriend) has just whatsapped me declaring he is having spinach with his lunch again. That’s normal right? Well actually it’s not. His standard lunch a couple of weeks ago was 100% beige. Small steps. I’ll have him drinking kale juice yet….

So, lovely people reading this, if you’ve had a crappy couple of weeks or months…. don’t worry about it. Just start making little changes. Remember there is no point starving yourself for two months on some insane diet or cleanse or detox or bootcamp to then go back to what you were doing before…. it needs to be permanent.

*sigh* – I’m feeling all mellow and zen this week. Must be the increased intake of veg.

Nando’s tonight with Chris – wait till I order half a chicken and eat the whole thing. Looks like we are running after as well. Running in the dark. Awesome. Who would have thought I’d be out endurance style running for “fun”…

Had some really amazing messages from people the other day when I started writing again. Thank you. Some of you have completely blown me away with your stories of extreme challenges for charity that were “inspired” by me (going pretty rosy in the face over here to be honest) and to my mums with young children trying to eat well. Awesome. Actually that reminds me! There are tons of awesome accounts on Instagram for fitness mummies! I will find some for you!

Much foodie love on this zen afternoon. C xxx