Sums Are Hard

…didn’t write my final blog on Friday last week did I – FAIL.


…didn’t stay on track with my lean clean food over the weekend – FAAAIILLLL

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…didn’t stay sober, not even a little bit – BIGGESTFAILOFEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR


Needless to say, I’m not exactly basking in the glory of willpower and sticking to plan right now. Instead I am still feeling ever so slightly hungover and just to make it worse I think I am about twenty stone heavier than I was on Friday. Excellent. Humph.

Staying positive though ‘cos it’s the only way to be. The weekend didn’t go to plan in terms of food and drink but I DID have a solid run of training and diet through to Friday evening and an absolute blast with my buddies and my man in Wales. Major laughs and totally worth it… although a couple of GLASSES of wine on Saturday would probably have been a better call over a couple of BOTTLES. I can’t drink to save my life. I am rubbish. Paid for it yesterday though – when we got home I forced myself to do some skipping. It’s my new thing. 10 minutes burns over 100 calories. Incredible. Determined to look cool as f**k like those boxers do when they skip in the gym. Once I stop whipping myself in the face or getting the rope stuck in my hair mid jump I’m sure I’ll look awesome…


I had some interesting thoughts during the long drive(s) to and from Wales. Remember a couple of weeks ago I was saying my head was all messy with Instagram images of people smashing a billion workouts and lean food this and clean food that and juice this and low carb that? Well I was feeling a bit like that again over the weekend (squashed the messy thoughts with Kettle Chips and wine though) and when I started to think clearly I couldn’t help but compare the world of health and fitness with the world of fashion.


Picture this ok… You see those people walking around wearing every single ounce of “fashion” all in one go? The girls have the false lashes, fake tan, huge earrings, some kind of ribbon bow in their hair, a floaty blouse with some ripped denim pale wash jeans tucked into thigh high faux suede boots and a patent leather handbag with twenty decorative padlocks hanging off it which is clutched in their manicured to look like talons fingernails? The guys are wearing sweatpants with the knee length crotch, huge white shiny trainers, a super low cut t-shirt, a snapback cap and some beats around their neck? Now it is personal opinion and taste of course but I am not such a massive fan of the “put ALL the fashion on me” look. I think if you like your fashion maybe opting for one principal at a time is a better look.

Now if I think about health and fitness it can be similar. People (i.e. ME) read all the articles and follow all the social media accounts and then try and do everything without really thinking about what works for them or what suits them best. I am terrible for this. I forget everything I learned studying nutrition and training like an athlete for Ironman and I let myself be brainwashed by the masses and masses of information I come across each and every day.


I keep trying to wipe the slate clean and stick to the basic principles that I know work and yet I keep falling at the 2nd or 3rd hurdle. However – as Michael Jordan said – “I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I can’t accept not trying”. TOTALLY. Like really absolutely yep. So I will keep trying until I find the glass slipper of health and fitness that keeps me happy and healthy and strong.


Speaking of basic principles – I spent a couple of minutes this morning doing some really hard sums (a 7 year old could do these sums…) to work out my BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate). This then allows me to determine how many calories I need in a day to maintain my current weight. I can then subtract 20% of that total and it gives me a starting point to drop some of the kettle chip softness around my previously abtastic midriff. Here’s the equation if anyone is interested:

That link then gives you the option to calculate your daily calorie needs which you then subtract 20% (or around 500kcals) from to get you shifting some lbs. No further complicated method needed (for now). I’ll be sticking with this for 2-3 weeks and then adjusting it.


HOWEVER – this method is focused on weigh ins and scales which I am not a fan of so I will be going with pictures and clothing and general “do I feel leaner or fatter”. Scales and past eating disorders don’t go hand in hand.


Week 1 of my swim training this week. 3 swim sessions and I’ll aim for 2-3 weight/strength training sessions on top of that. Depending on how my energy levels hold up I might keep up with some random skipping at home. It really is good! It counts as HIIT if you do it, funnily enough, for intervals. I reckon 60 seconds skipping flat out and then 30 seconds rest repeated 5-10 times over will be pretty conducive to torching some fat.


It’s bloody hard work though…

Consistency…. consistency…. consistency….. keep going….

Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen”

(Michael Jordan though #motivationalspeakernumerouno)

Sums Are Hard

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